Month 2

Friday, February 12, 2010


I am well into my second month of my Co-op. I feel like this experience so far has felt like a combination of an adventure, self-reflection, and a joke haha.. I only added a joke because the actual job entails a minimum amount of work. The only plus side is that the free time I have allows me to study turkish, browse on my computer, and to actually read for leisure. A major plus about this internship though is that my public speaking is improving. I really feel like my experience in India with the peacegames curriculum prepped me for this. I was such a mess at the beginning of my India dialogue because of all the little fears and emotional wounds that I let be exposed.

One thing I really learned while being out here is about emotional wounds. I truly feel that we all human beings have our own weaknesses; some of us show it more than others. But, I truly feel that we all have our own paths and things that we need to work on. Our dreams. We are the creators and directors of our dreams, and we all need to learn to take full advantage of making our lives the best that we can. Everyone else in our lives are just supporting actors with that said. We can choose how we want to live our lives and how we want to go about it. The results that you get based off of your education, job, friends, relationships, etc. show how you are living your life, and how your choices, assumptions, gossip, and your word affect you. But these very same entities can also make choices, assumptions, gossip, and their words that show their dreams and visions. Speaking of the choices, assumptions, words, and gossip you can see the things that people need to work on or the wounds that affects their lives. We all have emotional wounds and when we suffer from them we cannot blame others because they are only exposing your own wounds that you already have. They don't create them, you create them. With that said, I know I have my things to work on with all four of the examples I made. We all do to an extent, because we grew up in this world with a certain environment that had an impact on these qualities.

So what am I really trying to say? Well I am just reflecting on my past choices, and through that I picked out the ones that seem the most common that almost every person needs to work on. I think some people have some aspects of one more than the other. Maybe some people make too many assumptions to the point where they read too deeply into something. Or maybe some people need to use their word more wisely, because others may resent what they have to say. Or maybe some people should be careful of how they gossip (or try to avoid it completely), because it will only show your insecurities and cause others to judge you based off of that. And the choices you make will only continue that hell that you put yourself into, or the heaven that you are living.

Through my own lessons and experiences I am happy to say that I am growing and learning, and that I can say that I am working to heal my wounds, and to live the life of heaven.

=)

3 comments:

Daddy Squeeze Me! said...

AWWWW KEEP UP THE GOODNESS BABY!

Unknown said...

Great photograph, Jamar!!

Unknown said...

I'm really curious what you are going through because you do not make that clear in this point. You seem to be going on an emotional rant (which is fine) I just wanted to know what was the heart of YOUR issues, not the issues of OTHERS.

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